I guess I’m just on my soap box today. We’ve heard comments about “real parents” lately. What are “real parents”? How would you describe your parents? How did you know they were your parents? What did they do for you?
Did they tell you they loved you? Did they show you they loved you? Did they kiss your boo-boos? Did they wipe your tears? Did they get up in the middle of the night when you were throwing up or had a bad fever? Did they make you feel all better? Did they give you a warm bed to sleep in? Did they fix you yummy food to eat? Did they rejoice with you when you made good grades or learned a new word? Did they teach you things, like how to ride a bike or make a PB&J?
Really? Hmmmm…sounds like we are “real parents” too!
Just because you are a foster parent doesn’t mean you are not “real” or a “parent”. Trust me, waking up at 6am is very “real”. Having to find creative ways to discipline that really work is also “real”. Dealing with the stress of parenthood and protecting your child is so “real”. Wanting what is best for her and being her advocate is definitely “real”. For some reason I don’t feel very “fake”. I totally wouldn’t consider us to be “fake” parents. What are we then?
I think this is even more hurtful when you have adopted. I can understand the ignorance (sorta) of people when it comes to foster care. No, she isn’t “technically” ours. But for right now she is. I don’t love her with a “fake” love. I don’t see her as my “fake” or temporary daughter. Thus, for now, I am Momma and Jeff is Daddy.
End of story.